How to Talk to Ex Gf Again

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Splitting up is hard, only it's peachy to take your ex wanting you back. The process of making her similar y'all again starts right after you interruption up. Everything yous do tin potentially hurt or help your case. By taking the fourth dimension to analyze your relationship, work on yourself, and strategically communicate with her, yous tin win her back.

  1. 1

    Try the no contact rule. Determine a set amount of time where you volition no longer interact with your ex. This includes telephone calls, text messages, social media, and in person meetings. Y'all are not to initiate contact or respond to her at all. This will give both of you infinite to heal and piece of work out your feelings.[ane]

    • The no contact period is typically 21, 30, or 45 days. Whatever period y'all choose, yous must stick to the plan.
    • No contact will give both of you time to heal and likewise requite your ex-girlfriend time to miss you lot.
    • If the human relationship ended desperately, this menstruum will allow both of you to cool off and work through any negative feelings.[2]
  2. 2

    Stop engaging with her on social media. Even if yous no longer talk to your ex, seeing pictures of her and knowing what she is doing will make you want to contact her. Constantly getting updates about her life through social media will make things more difficult for you. You too may find out information y'all do not want to know such equally she is dating someone else.[iii]

    • If yous need to unfriend or block your ex-girlfriend on social media, and so you lot should. You do not accept to allow your ex-girlfriend know that yous are taking these steps.
    • Do non mail how lamentable or depressed you are almost the breakdown either.

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  3. 3

    Evaluate the human relationship. Since you are no longer talking to your ex, you have time to think about the relationship. Consider the pros and cons of the relationship. Think well-nigh the things that you did well and things that you did not. Besides, think of the things you can do differently if y'all become another chance with her.

    • It may be helpful to write a pros and cons list down on a piece of paper. This will likewise help yous think about the relationship.
  4. 4

    Have care of yourself. You want to be the all-time version of yourself yous can be. This will make you more attractive to your ex when yous contact her again.[four] Eat salubrious and exercise. Spend time with friends and family who love you. Practise activities that you not have had fourth dimension to do when yous were in a relationship such as volunteer, play video games, read, etc.

    • It'southward too fine if you practise not feel like going out a lot or existence social. Exercise whatever you need to do to heal from the relationship such as meditating, journaling, or spending fourth dimension alone watching movies.
    • If there are personality traits or issues that you had in the relationship such as acrimony, jealousy, insecurity, taking her for granted, or being controlling brainstorm to work on those things. Seek professional person help if you need to.
    • Write down the type of man you want to be and begin to piece of work on each of those things.
  5. 5

    Avoid talking negatively virtually her. After a breakup, information technology is tempting to badmouth your ex. You may say some things that you practise not actually mean. Saying bad things about her to your family, her friends, or your friends is non helpful. If your ex finds out what you have been saying about her, yous may ruin your chances of getting back together with her.

    • Do your all-time to keep the details of your relationship private.
    • Refrain from posting most your relationship on social media as well. This includes, subliminal messages such every bit song lyrics, music videos, or quotes.

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  1. 1

    Contact your ex. In one case the no contact period is over, achieve out to your ex. You lot can do this through an e-mail, phone call, letter, or text message. If you write an email or alphabetic character, tell your ex that y'all accept accepted the breakup, apologize for anything that y'all did wrong, and tell her something interesting nearly your life since the breakdown.[five]

    • If yous send a text message, attempt to say something that starts a conversation, is flirty in nature, and does not bring up anything negative.
    • Try texting, "Hey, I was watching X on Television and I information technology made me think of yous :)" You lot could also text them about a skillful retentiveness that y'all guys fabricated together. For example, "Remember when we went to that great restaurant.."
    • Your initial contact should non mention getting back together or that yous miss her or y'all love her.[half dozen]
  2. 2

    Admit your mistakes and apologize. You have had time to evaluate your human relationship. Now is the time to admit to your mistakes and tell her that you are sorry. This shows her that you have matured and put a lot of thought into what happened between the 2 of you. She will also begin to see how you have taken steps to get a better man.[vii]

    • This can be done in person or on the telephone. Information technology is better not to take long or emotional conversations through text messaging.
  3. 3

    Ask her on a appointment. At present that yous and your ex have been communicating, ask her if she would like to go on a appointment or hang out. Try to be very coincidental and polite when you ask her. Do not make this out to be a big deal. Try saying, "Hey, practise you want to go go java or something?" or "Permit'south become together to catch up." Yous tin can also utilise the phrase "hang out" instead of "date."[8]

    • If she is reluctant, you might say, "It's only coffee. What would it hurt?"
    • If she does not want to meet up with you, do not push the issue. Give her space. Tell her, "I respect that you don't desire to run across upward, let me know if y'all change your mind. It would exist bang-up to see you lot."
  4. 4

    Woo her again. To win her dorsum, yous must do all of the things that you did to make her interested in you the beginning time. If you used to send her flowers or write her sweet notes, begin to do those things once more. Think of this opportunity as a new relationship. You lot demand to make her fall for y'all once again.[9]

    • Although you want to impress her, do non be needy or beg her to be with you once more. This will only make you look insecure or weak. You want her to take you dorsum because y'all are a not bad guy non considering she feels sorry for you.[10]
    • Do non say things similar, "I can't live without you."
  5. 5

    Avoid bringing upward the past. You and your ex are starting over over again. Focus on the positive things that made your relationship work the kickoff fourth dimension around.[11] If y'all won her over past being funny, continue to make her laugh. If she enjoyed your cooking, ready a nice meal for her.

    • Focus on building new memories with her. She needs to meet how things volition be different this time effectually.
  6. 6

    Start slowly. You cannot pick up where you left off when you get back together. Care for this every bit a new relationship.[12] Take your time and get to know each other once again. You also practice not desire to overwhelm her or put pressure level on her to get dorsum together. Focus on building a potent friendship.[xiii]

    • Exercise non text or telephone call everyday.
    • Exit on dates and do activities together. Larn her likes, dislikes, and habits again.
    • Hold off on the physical aspect of the relationship and spend more time talking.
  7. 7

    Know when to give up. If your ex completely resists all of your effort, you lot demand to respect her decision. If she tells you to go out her lonely or that she has moved on, you lot demand to motion on also. Beingness besides needy and persistent will make you expect bad and could ruin whatsoever chances of getting her back in the future.

    • If she has a new boyfriend, be respectful of her new human relationship. Practice non try to become her to pause upwardly with her new boyfriend. Be patient and see if her new relationship is serious or merely a rebound.

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Add New Question

  • Question

    How do yous make your ex girlfriend miss you?

    Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW

    Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist, Author, and TV/radio host based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli is currently in private practice and specializes in individual and couples' relationships, depression, feet, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. Kelli also facilitates groups for those struggling with booze and drug addiction equally well as anger management groups. As an author, she received a Side by side Generation Indie Book Award for her book "Thriving with ADHD: A Workbook for Kids" and also wrote "Professor Kelli'southward Guide to Finding a Hubby". Kelli was a host on LA Talk Radio, a human relationship expert for The Examiner, and speaks globally. You can as well meet her piece of work on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/kellibmiller, Instagram @kellimillertherapy, and her website: www.kellimillertherapy.com. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Folklore/Health from the University of Florida.

    Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW

    Relationship Coach

    Skillful Answer

    You can't necessarily make your ex-girlfriend miss you. However, you lot can repent to her for your mistakes and show her that you're willing to do better in the hereafter.

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  • Heartbreak is hurtful, but exist strong. Talk to her, and if she doesn't want you dorsum, take information technology and motility on.

  • Be patient. It may accept longer to get back together than you expected.[xiv]

  • You want getting back together to be your ex girlfriend'southward idea. Be the man she has always wanted.

  • Even if yous practice non become her dorsum, know that you lot will exist ok.

  • Even if she has a new man even so winning her back volition be the same if you don't have the situation reversed.

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About This Article

Commodity Summary X

To make your ex-girlfriend want you lot dorsum later a breakup, effort to avert any contact with her for at to the lowest degree a couple of weeks. This will give yous time to heal and give her fourth dimension to miss you lot. During this menses, don't mail service subliminal messages online or talk negatively about your ex, since this could ruin whatsoever adventure you have of getting back together. Instead, focus on condign the best version of yourself past eating healthy, exercising, and spending time with friends. Then, when your no-contact menstruation is over, reach out to her, acknowledge your mistakes, and apologize. If you desire her back, inquire her out on a date to run across if she also wants to requite it another effort. For more advice, like how to start over with your ex-girlfriend, read on.

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